Life After Divorce: Getting Your Self-Esteem Back After Divorce

Photo by cottonbro

Whether a clean breakup or not, separation and divorce are one of the most devastating experiences that can alter one’s perception of life. During the first months or years of the relationship, you feel high with love, but as soon as the love of your life decides to leave you, it’s as if you’ve fallen hard on rock bottom.

No matter how messy (or not) the divorce may be, it is undeniable that both parties will be severely affected by this. Both you and your ex-partner may have a hard time recovering, which makes it all the more difficult to get right back up. Sometimes, you might notice yourself slowly falling apart, but with the right amount of confidence and motivation, you’ll be able to return to action.

6 Tips to Boost Self-Esteem

You don’t have to lose yourself amid all this mental and emotional chaos; you can still recover by injecting the right amount of confidence into your self-esteem. Here are 6 tips that you can use to boost your self-esteem after a divorce:

  1. Seek Help

Divorce is a life-altering experience. It could feel truly heavy if you choose to detach yourself from your friends or families. Bottling up your emotions is akin to that of a kettle about to burst. You will inevitably buckle under pressure if you continue to keep all of your negative emotions just to yourself.

Reaching out to your loved ones can be a great stepping stone to healing that broken heart of yours. Learn to open up to your friends or even reconnect with those family members that you’ve fallen out with.

Seeking emotional support can greatly lift so much weight on your shoulders and will help you carry that burden of yours along with them.

  1. Be Mindful of your Children

This tip is mostly applicable to couples who have children along the course of their marriage. Sometimes, married couples might use their children as an excuse to not separate, but unbeknownst to them, introducing your kids to more conflicts in their household is causing more damage to their psyche than seeing their parents go through a peaceful separation. 

Although some parents may think that staying together is the better option for their kids, they are actually causing more damage than good.

To avoid any further conflict, be sure to act peacefully towards your ex-spouse and properly compromise a plan that would not affect your children in the most negative light.

  1. Control your Emotions

Emotions can easily cloud your judgement, especially in situations like these. Try doing more self-reflection to become more in touch with your emotions. By doing this, you can acknowledge the source of all your stress and help you control it, rather than letting your negative feelings go haywire, which will possibly damage any situation.

  1. Prioritize your Health

Studies have shown that intense exercise can increase your cortisol and dopamine hormones, which can positively charge your brain with pleasurable emotions. Exercising more can also help you get in shape and better your physique, thus helping out with your overall self-esteem if you wish to look young and attractive again.

Focus on factors that can better improve your health, such as diets, meal plans, exercise, or even physiotherapy. 

Physiotherapy can reduce the risks of illnesses and injuries and can help you be allied with a health professional. Engage in this could lessen the stressors in your life post-divorce. 

Try various clinics online or search for Guelph physiotherapy clinics that can help you in becoming the best version of yourself.

  1. Self-Love

Self-love begins with self-acceptance and it can only function with mindfulness. When you choose to be more mindful of your situations in life, only then will you be more cognizant of all the internal issues that you are facing at the moment. 

As soon as you realize that, you can avoid the triggers that might cause your stressors and in turn, focus on the things that actually matter, such as wholly loving yourself through and through. 

You can start by expressing this newfound love for yourself by beginning with your physical appearance. You can go on spa dates and treat yourself to luxurious outfits. Or, maybe even try out a new haircut or go for a teeth whitening experience in Brampton.

  1. Grieve

Although it seems hard to forget your memories with your ex-partner, the first step to moving on is by giving yourself enough time to grieve. 

Don’t rush the process and don’t set a time limit for yourself. Grieve as much as you need to let all of your emotions thoroughly flow right through you. Grief has no expiration date. You are entitled to whatever emotion you feel in the moment, whether it be anger, frustration, relief, or sadness. 

Remember that divorce may not always be the immediate answer. If you feel as if this misunderstanding between you and your spouse may be a mere hiccup in your relationship, try marriage counselling in Windsor, Ontario so that the 2 of you may fix it out. 

However, if you feel as if it’s time for the both of you to accept that you no longer fit with one another, then never be ashamed to make this decision because in the long run, no matter how hard the choice may be at first, you may realize that this was what both of you truly needed.